PermaLink The left lane10/13/2008 08:41 PM
I've been compiling this list in my head for a few months now.  I guess I should put it online, which is after all a bigger collective brain than mine.

YOU ARE BARRED FROM DRIVING IN THE LEFT LANE ON ANY FEDERAL INTERSTATE HIGHWAY IF:

  • You are from Pennsylvania
  • You have any of your fingers in your mouth
  • You are driving at the speed limit regardless of conditions
  • You are a Chinese national and another Chinese national taught you to drive
  • Your car is missing more than one wheel cover
  • You are using your "donut" emergency spare tire
  • You have a handicapped-driver license plate, placard or hang-tag
  • You are towing any type of garden, lawn or farm equipment on a trailer
  • You or any passenger are extending any portion of your anatomy beyond the boundary of your car's windows. This includes bare feet propped on mirrors and anyone pretending their hand is an airplane, particularly the driver
  • It is snowing and you learned to drive in any zip code whose first digit is higher than "1".
  • Your nails are longer than 2" as measured from the cuticle
  • Your car bears "historic" or "antique vehicle" plates
  • You have a window sticker advertising Herbalife or Shaklee
  • Your mouth stays open more than 40% of the time
  • Your wireless phone is within two inches of any part of your body
  • More than half of the passengers in your car are of questionable immigration status and employed in landscaping-related trades
  • Both you and your front-seat passenger are wearing hats other than baseball caps
  • You ever voted for Franklin Roosevelt or any of his competitors
  • You are carrying any type of bedding on top of your vehicle
  • You are driving or towing a recreational vehicle and do so fewer than 20 days per year
  • It is a weekday and you are traveling to or from an appointment with any of the following: podiatrist, chiropractor, proctologist, psychic or hairdresser
  • You are from Ohio or Connecticut and are driving anywhere outside those states
  • Your car has a clothes-hanger bar installed across the rear passenger area and there are clothes hanging on it

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2. John Smart10/15/2008 10:11:54 AM
Homepage: http://www.greyduck.com


> You have any of your fingers in your mouth
.. or your nose.

> It is snowing and you learned to drive in any zip code whose first digit is higher than "1".

...excepting Minnesota. If there's anyone in the US who knows how to drive in the snow/ice, it's us.




3. Gerry S10/14/2008 10:48:51 AM


Also...

Your car has difficulty getting to the speed limit in a avg(8secs) amount of time.
AND
If you dont have AWD or 4WD then dont drive in the left lane if there is any preciptiation.




4. Declan Lynch10/13/2008 11:20:38 PM
Homepage: http://www.qtzar.com


Hmm, am I classed as being from PA???

Totally agree with all the other points...





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