PermaLink Steinbagged12/02/2008 03:59 PM
Or, what the ITFactory implosion means to you.

It isn't often that I get to introduce a new word to the lexicon, but this week, I get to do so. Several, really.

steinbag (verb) - to completely fuck up something you thought was running OK after the last time it was fixed.

and

steinbagger (noun) - someone who completely fucks something up that had already been fixed once.


In case you missed it this week, the Danish ISV, ITFactory, declared bankruptcy after it was discovered that something around 500 million Danish crowns (around $85 million US) was missing and that an enormous amount of ITF's purported revenue last year was probably fictitious, leaving them with somewhere around $50 million in debt at one Danish bank alone. And most intriguingly, the CEO, one Stein Bagger, has disappeared from his family vacation in Dubai over the weekend, leaving his wife and kid to report him missing.

I would say that it's safe to say ITFactory won't be doing the phoenix act again. Most of you remember its first implosion, six or seven years ago, and I for one was surprised that within a year or two brigades of black-t-shirted ITFactory guys could be seen roaming around Lotusphere in packs. I couldn't figure out how they managed to come back to life. Apparently, they really didn't.

So, on to words. I can hear you saying, "but Turtle, how can I make use of these fine new words in my everyday conversation?" Here are some examples:

"Man, after I had the engine in the Audi rebuilt, the dude left the oil plug out of it, so the engine's completely steinbagged now."

"We hired this contractor who came in and forgot to disable replication between our Domino test server and the customer's main site, so it's generating a million entry-not-found-in-index errors. What a frickin' steinbagger."

"Molly, I just fixed your hair dryer for your trip, but if you plug that thing into a European 220-volt outlet you're gonna steinbag that thing but good."

"I shipped that laptop back to Dell, and all they did was put in a used hard drive and ship it back to me. It won't boot now. What a complete steinbag operation."

See how nicely it flows off the tongue? Try it out on your friends, and don't be surprised if within a week your friends are casually using it in conversation with their co-workers and relatives. When you hear Chris Matthews or Steven Colbert use it on television in a few months, it'll already be passe among you, the insiders.

Just mark my words.

Practical matters: I sure hope that IBM already cashed the check that ITF likely gave them for a third straight year of Knowledge-Level sponsorship at Lotusphere. Their press releases over the last couple of years have been very proud of their sponsorship, though I have to admit, you never really saw a whole lot of non-blackshirts around their pedestal down in the Product Showcase. Part of that was that ITF was selling what they called "platform as a service," which I don't think anyone has been able to explain to me in less than an hour. It's not like most "services" the vendors at the Sphere are pushing, which are pretty readily explained, even to me. In their first incarnation, back in the days, it appeared that their "business" was vacuuming up interesting little Domino shops and making them vanish, but I could never quite figure out what, exactly, their business was in their most recent incarnation.

Fraud as a service, I guess, for those people too unsophisticated to do it themselves.

Now, to be fair, a lot of good people have worked for ITF over the years, and I'm not blaming them for what the Steinbagger-in-Chief has alleged to have done. They're likely sitting home right now, having a danish, and wondering where to get their next job. The real impact of the ITF collapse may be in the pall it will cast over all small to midsize software and services companies in the Domino world. I mean, they partnered with a lot of people, including some people I know. They did business with a lot of customers who are now left in the lurch, and probably made wary of dealing with anybody smaller than IBM itself. That sucks for everybody.

Let's just hope this doesn't steinbag the whole market.

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Blabber :v

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18. Turtle12/03/2008 10:23:50 AM
Homepage: http://www.weightlessdog.com/shell.nsf


I think it's hilarious that he claimed to have gotten his doctorate from a university that looks like, if you read it fast, "STFU."




19. Bill Brown12/03/2008 09:23:12 AM


What a steinbagger! Seem's he was working on this for a while:

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20. Turtle12/02/2008 11:07:00 PM
Homepage: http://www.weightlessdog.com


And then I find this person on FaceBook:

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21. Turtle12/02/2008 11:04:55 PM
Homepage: http://www.weightlessdog.com


Consider it done! Both "steinbag" and "steinbagger" are now under editorial review at UrbanDictionary.com.




22. John Smart12/02/2008 10:06:47 PM
Homepage: http://www.greyduck.com


That's great!

Add it. Now. { Link }




23. Darren Duke12/02/2008 05:21:15 PM
Homepage: http://blog.darrenduke.net


Isn't a "danish" just called "breakfast" in Denmark?




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